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All posts for the month December, 2010

I LIKE IT!

Published December 17, 2010 by jean cohen

It’s certainly beginning to feel a lot like Christmas here.  Do’s, do’s, do’s.  I had three parties in one day, a luncheon, afternoon tea, and a posh dinner.  I confess; I only changed twice.

I trained it up to London to meet JDavid to go to the party at the American Embassy on Tuesday night.  The tube from Waterloo to Bond Street was mobbed.  Actually, London was packed.  I was a bit worried about finding David in the undulating mass of commuters, but it worked out okay.  Mobiles do serve a purpose.

I was really sort of glad that I got up to the city at the holidays.  London is really pretty at night with all the decorations, almost as nice as New York.

The Embassy looked really pretty too, especially after we got through the queue outside and made it into Security, where it was warm.  Security was stringent this year; they made me take off my watch to go through the metal detector and hand searched my purse.

The party was great: fantastic food, fabulous wine, and friendly Americans. I met a couple from Philly.  David expected a concise biography of every former US Ambassador whose portrait was hanging in the Great Hall.  The only one I even recognized was Joe Kennedy.  After the party we strolled Bond Street before stopping for a nice meal.  Then it was on to Waterloo and our train home.

The Sam Beare Fundraising Team had a luncheon at Anne’s house on Friday.  Somehow I had committed myself to making Wedding Soup – for 25 people.  I slotted the time to cook it for Thursday night, after my shift at Sam. 

I was busily rolling teeny weeny meatballs when the phone rang.  It was Adrianna, saying she’d pick me up at 7:45 for Book Club.

“Is that tonight?” I whinged. “I put it on my calendar for next Thursday.”  Another Jeano moment.  I had struggled through the damned book – ‘Reuben Sachs’ – absolutely detesting it, and I wanted to hear what the rest of the group had to say.   At some event or other at Syn, I’d mentioned to someone how much I disliked it.  His reply was “Well, it’s a very English book and you’re a foreigner…”

However, the wedding soup prevailed and I missed the (possibly) scintillating discussion on Reuben.  I believe they compared it to ‘Daniel Deronda’.  Gee, I didn’t read that one either. 

But on a Facebook test that’s going around, I’ve read 92 out of 100 ‘classics’.  So it must be them, not me.  And I’ve traveled to 43% of the world.  And I’m the sixth hugged person among all my friends.  Facebook is insidious.

But I have to give Facebook a Like!.  I found a long lost friend.  I’d emailed all my Incollingo cousins in Colli asking if they knew a cousin of mine who’d moved back to Colli from Philly in the early ‘70’s.  We’d been best friends, but these things happen, and you lose touch.

I got a lovely message from a young man.  After I translated it, he’d said he was Maria’s son and yes, she remembered me and was dying to talk to me.  He provided her phone number and I immediately rang her.

We talked for two hours!  Her English is a little rusty, but we managed.  She was most impressed by the saga of my Italian citizenship.  Anyway, she invited me to Colli for Christmas, but I’m going to Israel, of course.  What better place to spend Christmas?  But I didn’t have anything special planned yet for Easter, so I’m going to Colli to stay with mia cugina Maria! 

And a real big Like! to the Dog Murderer this week.  I love that he beat the ‘Boys in the House that Jerry Built and that the Eagles are in first place in the NFC East.  Did you know that he’s leading all NFL players in the voting for the Pro Bowl?  I read on Fox Sports that his kids really want a dog for Christmas, but he’s banned from ever owning one again.  Come on.  Favre sexted pictures of his willy to women.  Is he banned from owning a mobile? Somebody with time on their hands (the ones who post every stupid thing that crosses their little minds) should start a campaign on FB to get the poor little Vick children a puppy.

 Does anybody know?  Is Favre … like … you know… circumcised?

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SNOW IS A 4-LETTER WORD

Published December 4, 2010 by jean cohen

Following the wise advice of BooBoo and Toots, I’ve started saying ‘no’ a lot more.  So I actually had some down time for myself.  I didn’t think either of them meant that saying ‘no’ thingy with regard to social engagements, so I haven’t… declined lunch, dinner or coffee invitations, that is.

I had a fairly light week on tap, other than hosting a Girls’ Night to wrap pressies for the Senior Centre’s tombola, Cheese Boy’s birthday dinner, Film Club, a Hanukkah party at shul, and a date, plus work work to finish.

The Girls’ Night was fun.  As I was hosting (and I can’t wrap for shit) I just had to refill the wine glasses and pass around the nibblies.  I made my famous Philadelphia Cream Cheese dip, which was a huge hit.  Honestly, if one more person says something stupid about ‘cream cheese’ and ’Philadelphia’, I’ll …  I don’t know; probably start saying I’m from Baltimore or somewhere.  We don’t even call it ‘Philly’ in Philadelphia.  We call it ‘cream cheese’ ‘cos that’s what it is!  Who goes to Hymie’s and says “An everything bagel with a shmear of Philly?”  The Counter Guy might stick a Tastykake on your bagel.

Wow!  I just started jonesing for a real American onion bagel with a shmear.  I don’t like everything bagels.

Cheese Boy’s birthday was way more subdued than mine.  We went out on Monday night because the weather forecast was for snow from Tuesday until eternity. 

It’s hard to please everybody, especially the ‘everybody’ who doesn’t eat pasta or anything that ever laid near cheese.  So we went to an Italian Restaurant in Staines called Momma Mia.  Did I mention that if I’m not happy, nobody’s gonna be happy?

It was fantastic!  The best Italian food I’ve had in England.  That’s probably because they were Italian, not English.  We had dinner and then went back to mine for dessert and coffee (they didn’t have cannoli, but assured me if I rang that I was coming, they’d whip up a few).  The Boy, in true Birthday Boy/Honored Guest status, parked in front of the telly to watch Barcelona and Real Madrid kick a round white ball up and down the field for what seemed like days.

I woke up Tuesday morning and shrieked.  UnIntellicast had got it right for a change.  It had snowed in bucolic Surrey.  A couple inches.  And in true British valour- you know, surviving The Blitz blah blah blah-  the entire country surrendered as usual and came to a standstill.  Déjà vu all over again.  This was another third for me… never mind firsts.  The third bloody year in a row a killer blizzard pummeled England and I was stuck in the house.

I watched BBC News for a while for entertainment as terrified people proclaimed the end of the world and whinged plaintively about flights to Anywhere Besides England cancelled and rioted over the last loaf of Warburton’s bread at Sainsbury’s.

I nixed Tea Lady duty and hunkered down to ride it out.  Film Club was cancelled due to the hazardous roads.  Maybe Elmbridge should buy a plow and some salt?  Nobody shovels.  The only people who seem to actually own a shovel are farmers. 

I asked BooBoo very seriously if Daniel, Son of BooBoo and Head Lawn Guy, would be coming over to clear my walk.  Her reply:  “Tee hee hee!  Are you having an American moment?”

Well actually the rest of my week pretty much got cancelled, my date, plans for dinner with friends and the Hanukkah party.  I was looking forward to homemade latkes.  I was not a happy camper; I had major cabin fever.

But I have been faithfully lighting the candles in my Menorah each evening.  And just as religiously checking out the weather in Tel Aviv.  It’s 75 degrees and sunny there; and the men are all circumcised.  Hey, I think I just described my Promised Land.

If the Blizzard of ’11 is over, the coming week should be a busy and social one, thank goodness.  Dinner at Carol’s, Book Club,   meeting a friend in London for Afternoon Tea, and the (now) Annual American Embassy Cocktail Reception with JDavid. Plus meetings and work.  Tombstones is crossing the pond on Sunday, and when HRH and PP are otherwise engaged, hopefully we’ll manage to meet up.  I’m really excited.  A whole evening with Mr. T…  Talking football.